I used to have a solid picture in my head of how I would end up as an adult. This image keeps resurfacing, because currently I feel like I'm floundering. I'm not sure if the unsteadiness is a result of being a stranger in a new city, or if I'm just having one of those notorious quarter-life-crises. The constructed vision of my future-self first came to me when I was in middle school. It wasn't just a "this is what I want to be when I grow up" kind of thing, but an actual image of my twenty-something-year old self. I saw myself sitting on the top of my car (don't have one of those), wearing an orange dress (I'm not sure I even own a dress anymore), listening to a musical number (meh), with bright blue hair.
Yeah. None of that is happening up in here.
I also had this secondary image of myself living in New York City with my cat, working as a novelist. I'm not entirely sure where these images came from. I think as a pre-teen I just pictured the coolest person I could, & aimed for that.
While my hair is naturally boring-brown & I'm not living in New York, I am trying to strive for those plans I made long ago. Not visually as much, but more so I'm striving for the intent behind those visual conclusions. I saw having a car as an accomplishment, something very "adult." I like to think that I've got a little bit of that "adultiness" going on in my life right now, what with moving to pursue a career, being in a long-term relationship, & having complete independence. I wanted to be a writer/novelist. While I don't write in my career, I am working in a field (video editing) that pertains to not only my college degree, but also my interests. Between work & blogging, I'm doing what I enjoy. Dying your hair blue means you don't care about what others think of you. This one I struggle with, but the older I get the easier it is to be true to myself & to stand up for myself. The orange dress throws me for a loop. Any insight on that one is appreciated.
TL;DR - I'm panicking about getting older, but it's okay. It's okay because I've got a plan, albeit a rough one. And it's okay because while I'm panicking, I'm not scared. There are so many good things in my life right now. Being an adult is weird/difficult/stressful, but I'm totally going to nail it.
Anyway, happy weekend! Yay Friday, right?
This week's links:
- Why you should totally be eating avocados & a delicious way to drink them
- Or, you know, go the other way completely & make espresso-glazed cinnamon rolls (ohmygoodness yes please)
- The Senate totally Leslie Knope-d it after the D.C. snowstorm
- A look back on a bunch of other influential women who just did not give one
- I can't get over these party-having dinosaurs (+ tutorial!)
- Many sleepless nights come to an end as we discover the reason there's a teeny tiny pocket in your jeans
P.S. Stay warm all winter with a knitted ombre scarf.